How much is that doggie
by meteor prime
Summary: Fill for a Prompt. Bobby just can't seem to keep the nextdoor neighbours b**tard dog out of his yard!


A fill for a prompt on Tumblr.

Disclaimer: me-no-own-ey

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Bobby gets out into the yard just in time to yank the snarling little beast off 'a Rumsfeld before the miserable little creature strangled him with his own collar. The snarling little thing snaps at his fingers, its blood red eyes spinning madly and froth at its mouth.

"Oi! Get your hands off of my bloody dog!" Oh great, and there's its owner. Bobby drops the Chihuahua that bounds over to its master and leaps into his arms. Bobby's asshole next door neighbour pulls it too his chest protectively "Now now Growly, it's okay" he coo's. The little monster snaps its teeth and flaps its tongue about. Rumsfeld, tail between his legs, cowers behind his owners legs. Poor dopey dog. "You keep your goddamn monster of a mutt away from my baby!"

"You keep your goddamn demon dog outta my yard!" Bobby bellows back. The man, impeccable suit out of place in the dust and dirt of Bobby's lot, sneers

"My Growly wouldn't be caught dead in your yard!"

"He will if I get my hands on him!" Bobby snarls back. They go their separate ways fuming and nursing their pups.

Bobby groans and drops the towel that he'd been drying up with on the kitchen top and hurries out into the yard. Rumsfeld is yelping and spinning, the little monster chomping down on his tail with its needle teeth. Bobby doesn't even get near them before Growly's owner appears at the gate.

"Oi!" he yells in familiar greeting. It's not long before they're exchanging familiar pleasantries, cursing and swearing at each other and coddling their pets. Eventually the other man leaves storming away across the lot and out of the gate bellowing obscenities as he goes and Bobby is tugging a whining Rumsfeld inside to tape up his chewed tail.

"Damn soppy beast." He grumbles. Rumsfeld looks up at him with his big sad eyes and Bobby scratches him behind his ear affectionately.

This soon becomes a common occurrence. The miserable, yappy little Chihuahua creature would come pelting into his yard straight for his Rumsfeld and proceed to viciously attack him. Bobby would come thumping out of the house yelling and cursing and no sooner would he pull them apart that Growly's owner would come belting round the corner to give him a good earful. Eventually it got to the point where they'd stand toe to toe for nearly an hour shouting at each other, cursing and insulting each other with increasingly absurd and imaginative comments. Both would end up red faced and flustered before stomping back to their respective houses in a rage.

Bobby would potter about the house cursing and spluttering over the rudeness of the bastard for hours after their arguments. Dean had jokingly commented that he'd become obsessed.

Bobby had seen him coming from the window. He's stormed out to meet him, words eager on his tongue. They met half way, toe to toe, nose to nose

"Get your bloody dog off of-!" the man paused, face slack

"Why don't you-" Bobby began before looking to the dogs. He paused "... what... what are they doing?"

"Are... are they mating?" Bobby looked up at his neighbour as he looked up at him. Their eyes met. They both grimaced.

"Come on." Bobby grunted, grabbing the man by his shoulder he dragged him up onto the porch and into the house.

Jesus, he was gonna have to get very drunk to get that image out of his head. He hurried through into the kitchen, went to pour himself out a drink and decided on the bottle instead. The man strolled through into the kitchen after him, peering about the house curiously.

"I gotta say," he said, leaning on the door frame "I never saw that one coming." Bobby grunted

"Pull up a seat." He said and took out another glass. The man pulled out a chair and perched on it backwards. He took the offered glass, sniffed its contents, openly grimaced and put it back down.

"That was truly horrifying." He said at length, Bobby grunted

"I didn't even know that thing of yours was a girl."

"Oh she is," he said pleasantly "And a right little bitch at that!" Bobby frowned at him suspiciously

"I thought she was your 'little angel'." The man grinned

"Well," he smiled with wicked eyes "I might have embellished a little." Bobby laughed, full and hearty. The man grinned back.

"Y'know," said Bobby through watery eyes "I don't even know your name."

"Fergus McCleod." He said "But my friends call me Crowley."

"Very well Fergus," Bobby nodded as he got up to find himself another bottle "How'd you end up in Sioux Falls?" Fergus grinned

"Am I really that obvious? Business I'm afraid. An opportunity turned up near here and I took it. Don't ask me what- it's terribly boring- but I think we can safely say that it's not all I imagined it to be." He smiled, Bobby frowned at him

"Nothin' wrong with Sioux Falls." He grumbled and his neighbour laughed

"Oh now darling, I never said there was!" Bobby started at the term but tried not to let it show "It's just not for me is all." He turned and peered through the doorway "D'you reckon they're done yet?" Bobby grimaced.

"I don't even wanna think about it."

Eventually they decided it was safe enough for them to go back outside. Rumsfeld lay asleep, tucked under his chin, perched on front paws Growly was curled watching them with beady red eyes. It/She growled as they approached. Fergus laughed and held up his hands. He turned to Bobby with a smile

"Looks like she's staying here a little longer. I'll pick her up later." Bobby nodded his approval. Fergus gave his dog his one last affectionate look and disappeared out the gate "Thanks for the drink!"

Around two and a half months later Fergus appeared on his doorstep with a grimace. In one arm was curled Growly under his other was a box of squeaking black things. Bobby let him straight in and ran upstairs to find as many blankets and cushions as he could. He took them downstairs and built a nest while Fergus comforted his exhausted dog.

Rumsfeld hurried into the living room as his mate was settled into the middle of the pillows. She'd given birth a few days ago but there'd been complications. Fergus had had to rush her to the vets for a caesarean; the pups had simply been too big for tiny body to deal with. Five of them had been born in the end. The first had died before it'd had a chance to live leaving four little black furry bodies squealing in the box.

Rumsfeld lay down next to his little wife who snapped at him lazily from her throne. Fergus called for soft towels but Bobby couldn't find any anywhere near soft in his house so his neighbour ran home to find some whilst Bobby filled a bucket with warm water. McCleod burst in back through the door his arms full of fluffy white things and he and Bobby gently bathed each little pup before laying them next to their mother to feed. They wormed around blindly, squeaking and wriggling as they fed before curling up into little warm balls of fur. Rumsfeld growled protectively a couple of times at his owner until Bobby tapped him on the nose then he quietened down and settled with just licking his mate and pups comfortingly. The little pups mewled to him familiarly and he watched them with tender eyes.

Once they'd finished the two humans settled with their backs against the seat of the sofa, completely worn out.

"Jesus," Bobby sighed "Poor gal." Fergus nodded, eyes closed

"She's a fighter."

"You're telling me." Bobby paused, watching thoughtfully as the exhausted mother settled down to sleep cushioned between the father and the pups. Rumsfeld watched Bobby intelligently with his big sad eyes before closing them peacefully. Bobby smiled. When looked round Fergus was watching him quietly, a little smile tugging at the corners of his mouth

"They're sweet aren't they?" he sighed, eyes drifting to the little round pups. Bobby nodded

"They are."

Over the next few months Fergus spent more time at Bobby's than he did at his own place, helping feed the pups, wash them and cuddling them. Well mostly he cuddled them and Bobby did all the hard work. At least that'd be what he said if you asked. In truth he found himself enjoying the bastards company more and more every day. Time flew past faster than thought possible and soon the little pups would bounding about, chasing their tails, chewing through the furniture and yapping around Bobby's feet twenty-four seven. Growly had made herself quite at home in her new house, though she frequently went home with her owner, and Bobby would often find her curled in his favourite chair. She'd bite him if he went anywhere near. Rumsfeld did nothing about it.

Just the same as his pet Fergus soon settled himself comfortably into Bobby's life. He swept in when he liked and swept back out when it suited him. He ate Bobby's food and drank Bobby's alcohol- though not without complaint, and dozed on Bobby's sofa.

He would sit, back resting against the seat playing with the pups as they rolled around, scrambling across his lap and chewing on his fingers with their little sharp teeth whilst Bobby watched affectionately from the kitchen. They were soon approaching the height of their mother and they would clearly grow to be bigger, though maybe not as big as Rumsfeld. Three were a patch work of black and brown and one was black as night with the same red eyes as his mother. Fergus had named him Marchosias. He was easily the man's favourite and it was clear in the way he treated him, far more firm and focussed on his training than with the others, it was obvious that he meant to keep him. The only problem was Bobby wasn't entirely sure he wanted to let him go.

Aware they couldn't keep them all, the pup with the sweetest temper (Apricot) they gave to Marcy, the sternest and most well behaved (Doc) they gave to Jody to be trained at as guard dog and friend. That left only too. Marchosias and Hunter. Hunter was a rebellious boy, tough spirited and quick to bite like his mother, he had sharp eyes and wolf's temperament.

Just as Bobby was beginning to despair as to what to do with him the Impala rolled up into the yard. The moment Sam was across the threshold Hunter belted up to him and Sam yelled happily scooping him up and swinging him around in the air. His huge hands were like a cage around the little pup's body and he laughed as it licked and bit his nose.

"You wan' him?" Sam looked to him in surprise. Dean, who'd swung his bag to the ground, looked to his brother who'd cradled the little pup to his chest; saw the look of happiness on his face and made up his mind

"Sure." He grunted. Sam looked at him shocked

"Dean-"

"Ah shut it Sammy," he rumbled "And throw him a stick or somethin'." Bobby grinned and pulled his boy into a man-hug. Sam ruffled Hunter's ears happily and the little dog beat his chest with its tail.

Sam caught Bobby alone later that day in the kitchen. Fergus had popped round and sat in the living room with the two pups scratching their bellies and spoiling them rotten with treats. Dean sat in the armchair and watched with secret amusement at the ease with which Bobby's next door neighbour relaxed in Bobby's house. Bobby knew he was in trouble the moment Sam snuck in with those big puppy dog eyes of his on full pelt. Jeez.

"So, Bobby..." he paused waiting for Bobby to somehow psychically guess his question and answer it "Your neighbour, Crowley, he seems nice." Bobby groaned, of course it'd be this

"Yeah." he grunted. Sam nodded

"He- a friend?"

"Well he's not my wife!" Sam looked at him searchingly

"Would you like him to be?" Bobby turned to him

"What?"

"Okay, okay that didn't come out right. I mean it's obvious he likes you, right?" Bobby rolled his eyes so hard it hurt "Bobby?" Bobby gave him a warning look

"Boy..."

"Do you like him, Bobby? I mean that would be totally fine if you did!" he added putting his arms up half to show he meant no offense and half to stop Bobby from hitting him.

"Are you suggestin' what I think you're suggestin', boy?" he growled. Sam backed down under the force of his glower

"Okay, look, maybe I was wrong, just, just promise you'll think about it okay?" Bobby growled and rolled his eyes turning back to his drying up

"Will it shut'yer up?" Sam grinned

"Yeah sure."

"Fine."

He hadn't intended to think about it all but when Sam had waved goodbye from the Impala, holding the door open so Hunter could jump in and scramble into the backseat, and when Dean had finally nodded and pulled out of the driveway. Well. He'd thought about it a lot.

Something about wandering back into the house after the boys had gone and finding it not empty... well... it was kind nice. The sound of laughter, the sense of life. Rumsfeld thudded down the stairs and walked over to press himself against his master's leg, his tail wagged lazily. Bobby reached down and scratched his boy's ears and Rumsfeld snuffled against his hand.

When the dog walked away Bobby assumed he was leading him to his food bowl as a reminder but instead he padded into the living room and sat down next to Fergus who greeted him and scratched his neck. Rumsfeld looked over Fergus's shoulder at him poignantly. Bobby felt something twist in his gut uneasily. Just then Fergus twisted to look over his own shoulder at Bobby and grinned

"Hello."

"Hi." Bobby rumbled feeling awkward just standing there in his own living room unsure of what to do. Fergus turned back to the dog's unaware of his discomfort. Bobby frowned at Rumsfeld for making him feel this way but the dog just looked back at him all innocent. Bobby growled

"I'm gonna dish up dinner." He rumbled as he hurried into the kitchen. Fergus rose to his feet after him

"Oh, do you want me to leave?"He called; Bobby stopped half way into the kitchen and turned to look at him. What a terrible mistake. His chest clenched tightly at the sight of the man standing rumpled and apologetic in his front room, the two dogs at his feet watching Bobby with imploring eyes.

"Pull up a chair." He grunted and hurried out of sight.

Dinner went by relatively catastrophe free though Bobby felt nervous and uncomfortable the whole time. Fergus seemed to have picked up on it as he kept teasing, taunting him and generally winding him up throughout the whole meal. Whenever Bobby'd find himself genuinely offended he'd look up to find Fergus grinning at him with twinkling eyes from under his dark lashes. Bobby would feel his chest pull so tight it'd feel like he couldn't breathe. It hardly made things any easier; in fact the only way Fergus could've made things harder was if he'd sat there with his toe in Bobby's crotch.

Eventually he'd be given the blessed excuse of carrying the plates out to the kitchen, his escape didn't last long however as Fergus stepped into the kitchen after him. He stripped of his jacket leaving just the crisp white shirt underneath and rolled up his sleeves. Bobby might have just swallowed. Just a little.

"Let me." He smiled. Jesus.

Crowley had done the washing up whilst Bobby had dried, it had been a relatively merciful system, Bobby too extracted by his work to be distracted by other things and Crowley too focused on his work to be a distraction. That was until he'd dropped a knife back into the bowl and reached in to grab it. Their hands had touched. Bobby had felt himself go red. He paused, it sounded almost as if the other mans breath had hitched- but that'd be crazy. They both pulled away quickly, Crowley handing him the knife with a little cough, and continued on with their jobs. They'd shared the towel to dry their hands and Bobby had fumbled it so much that he dropped it and Fergus had ducked into the living room again.

When Bobby had finally cooled his face enough to step in after him Crowley had been standing in the middle of the room awkwardly.

"Well." He said "Thanks for tea." Bobby swallowed suddenly feeling like an idiot.

"Here," he grunted "I'll –er- show you out." Crowley nodded and moved to step round the couch unfortunately Bobby did at the same time and they bumped off of the corner of the couch and into one other.

"Oh..." Crowley's face was close, far too close to his for comfort.

"Ah." They stayed there for an awkward amount of time. God his eyes were brown, real brown, and deep. "Oh," Crowley sighed through gently parted lips "Bloody hell." And then he kissed him. Bobby felt no shame at how little encouragement he needed. Instead he wrapped his arms around the shorter man and tugged him closer pulling the two of them front to front. Crowley groaned against his mouth and parted his lips. Eventually they'd had enough of kissing each other sore and stumbled up stairs to the bedroom where they fell into a pile of flailing limbs and roaming hands.

Bobby ran one hand gently through his mussed hair and the other down his arm. Crowley peered up at him warm eyed and contented from where he was snuggled against his chest. He sighed and parted his legs rubbing himself up against the other as he shifted for comfort. Bobby groaned and Fergus grinned at the noise leaning up to kiss him lazily. He hummed against Bobby's chest

"I think I need to get up." He purred into Bobby's throat as he kissed there, moving down onto his shoulder and stopping to smile against his chest. Bobby growled and wrapped his arms around him tightly. He laughed pulling up and away, he sniffed and wrinkled his nose "I really need to get up!" he grinned before leaning down to kiss his lover hungrily on the mouth. "I'll be back in a minute." He leaned over down the side of the bed to scoop up his pants and Bobby suddenly frowned

"Hey!" he barked and Crowley started knocking his head on the sideboard

"Ow! What?"

"Go on!" Bobby barked "Scoot!" Crowley looked at him bemused before turning to look to the door. Three little tails slipped out of sight. He laughed

"Nosey bastards!" he grinned turning back to kiss the frown from his lovers face "Nosey bastards."


End file.
